the road

I was looking at one of my favorite photo websites on Facebook (ok, truthfully probably the only photo website I look at).  There is was!  The photo of a beautiful, if slightly downtrodden, gateway with a small, inviting driveway, leading to a mysterious, undisclosed location. Now, I happen to know where the gateway is so the location is not a mystery to me.  But still, I looked at this photo today and I saw the possibilities of the future. 

Time passes and things change- age- if we must go there (which I really refuse to do.  I'm NOT getting older.  I won't allow it.)  The mortar between the bricks gets a little cracked.  The earth may settle under the footings.  The paint may chip away at the gate.  But looking at this photo, I don't see the reality of those things.  I see the flowers surrounding the gate- beautifying, enriching, encasing with life and promise.  I see the path, small, but big enough for the travel of whomever needs to go there.

I can imagine.  In a romantic mood, I can imagine a lovely young woman in a sunny yellow hooped dress with all the trimmings arm in arm with her beau strolling up the path to her home where her mother waits anxiously at the window.  In a more realistic mood, I can imagine two sisters fresh out of the creek, covered in algae and mud, chasing each other up the road to their mother waiting angrily at the window.  In a dramatic mood, I can imagine the battle-weary, damaged, tired young man slowly limping his way up the path as his mother wistfully at first, then joyfully, waits at the window.  But this was not a story about the mother who waits at the other end of the road- at least I didn't think so.  But maybe it really is- if I'm having a philosophical, spiritual mood that I wasn't aware of.

I thought it was a mood of decisions.  Not even that there is a decision to be made at this moment.  But choices are always there waiting.  So we choose.  There is the path forward, uncertain.  There is the path that we already traveled.  The path traveled is important too, no doubt.  The path traveled is what makes us who we are.  Every road we've tried, every fork with the choices we've made, every time we've left the path completely makes us who we are.

I think about the gateway.  Since I know where it is, I know what lies the other direction.   It's a well-maintained, historical, interesting cemetery.  I've spent many hours there throughout my life.  People I loved are buried there.  People I miss.  But the cemetery is not for the living.  If I stay there at that gateway thinking about the cemetery and the past, I'm not living. 

And now I mix my metaphors.  Life is not just about moving forward or staying back, it's also about choosing paths.  We don't see it, but in the location there are other paths nearby.  One path leads to the same place (convenient, that).  But nearby is another path that leads to another exciting possibility- in fact one that is a little less likely to get me arrested for trespassing.  Also there are two roads that lead to wonderful places.  So if I step back from the photo, I suddenly have more choices.  I can now insert my quote from a perfectly delightful poem by Robert Frost.  Admit it, you felt it coming.

 

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference

I seem to choose the less traveled path in principle.  Sometimes I wonder if I choose a path that requires a machete just because I like the struggle.  Other times I wonder if the path makes me interesting or just weird.  Sometimes I wish I would choose the common path just for the ease.  And sometimes I follow the "regular" path like a lemming.  And sometimes what seemed like the common path at the time, was not. 

Sheryl Crow, the queen of deep and quirky, gives this advice...
Jump in, let's go
Lay back, enjoy the show
Everybody gets high, everybody gets low,
These are the days when anything goes
Every day is a winding road
I get a little bit closer
Every day is a faded sign
I get a little bit closer to feeling fine

I'm certain Sheryl is talking directly to me.  She lets me know that it's ok!  Life is complicated and that's good.  Sometimes traveling the road will make me happy, sometimes it will make me sad, but I have to be on the road.  The show is worth it, and I will be fine.  And don't just do it halfway.  JUMP in.  Don't walk on that road.  Run, skip, dance, sometimes stroll leisurely, maybe even walk backwards, but do not just walk.  Sometimes bring a machete or a companion or a guide.  Sometimes wear hiking boots or rain boots or sandals.  Sometimes wear a parka or a sweater or a bikini (ok, never wear a bikini).

Do we follow the path?  Do we dare to see where it leads?  Do we make a choice less common?  Do we wander the path that might lead us home?  Yes!!  

Baileyville Photo:

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=216181528421038&set=pu.141602132545645&type=1&theater